I know you’ve heard of this saying so many times but when it’s being said to you it hurts a whole lot and what exactly do they mean? in your head all you can do is just Blame yourself and playback all the moments when you think you might have failed in the relationship and the question is what went south? I thought we were in the right track , I thought he or she was feeling me but I guess not again blaming yourself will not ease your pain it’s going to make your healing process longer you can sit there and beat yourself up on questions after questions on why but if they don’t even know I think it’s safe to say that they are more screwed up than you thought .
I had someone tell me that they needed to work on themselves and being with me was not a good idea for my sake for our sake as well I couldn’t accept it for the life of me from what it seemed how he portrayed things in life I thought he was happy with himself and his life all he needed was some much needed love that I thought could full fill him with but I was very wrong and the problem was that he needed to Love Himself first and foremost before anything , and I did tell him well I’m so sorry I am not good enough for you and I will always care for you no matter what my friendship with this man was very important to me because regardless he brought the best in me I don’t think anyone will either it was so different with him we only knew what we had and what we had was complicated yes it was but I was willing to risk it all and the sad part was that he wasn’t , dissapointed yes I was because he let me down and some of the things that he said to me was very hurtful and still to this day I don’t agree with him I called him selfish and a fool it was a very eye opener for me but I think I was left more confused than ever .
Months had passed and he seemed alot happier with himself and his self esteem looked more positive than ever I am sure he woke up one day and said I need change , I was not part of his change yes I was in a way we grew apart and I knew less of him as each day passed In the back of my head I thought maybe he had found someone he wanted to be with and that someone is not Me I still make the mistake in asking God “Why Not Me” ? I needed to let go don’t know how but it had to be done and all this time it wasn’t me it was Him .
We make the mistake in giving so much when in return we get nothing back not even a little hope or that “maybe’ I was always holding on to that that little piece of faith, sometimes you have to stop worrying. Have faith that things will work out, maybe not how you planned , but just how they’re supposed to.